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Thursday, June 11, 2009

Be Careful What You Pray For!

Okay, now I take back my words about time going by fast. This last week has really been slow moving for me. I guess its just because I am a little down about waiting for another court date. I dont mean to belittle those poor families who have it so much worse than us. There are many families that on their court date got a phone call that was so much worse than ours. They were all told that their babies/childrens court cases just werent seen at all and that no one knew when they would be seen. This was because their children were all abandoned in the capital city of Addis Ababa, and on that day, the judge found an agency unethically putting many babies/children through the adoption process. They were bought, sold, bribed for, etc. I cannot imagine EVER taking ANY amount of money for any of my kids. And none of us in the adoption process would ever want to receive a baby in this way. It is awful. Our adoption agency was not at fault, but because this was found, ALL abandoned cases from that city were put onhold indefinitely. Well, these poor families are going on week 4 of not knowing ANYTHING. So, 1 week for me to wait for a court date already set seems like I am wallering in self pity. I dont mean to and I dont see it as that. I just miss my baby soooooo much. Again, I asked Brad the other day how can we miss her and she has never even been here? No one would understand, unless they were in the adoption process. I felt her as mine before we ever saw her face. And I am longing for her. Its just such a strong emotion or feeling hard to describe. But it has made it IMPOSSIBLE to get her off my mind, no matter what I do. Its a sadness. Emptiness. And I remember praying for patience so many times throughout my life. Including patience with my children. Do you think when you pray for patience God waves his magic wand over you and blesses you with this amazing attribute? NOT! He puts you in situations where you have to be patient. Or you could choose not to be and be miserable. Just trying to focus on June 26. But this go around, the time is slow moving.

4 comments:

elisa said...

Hey Fran, I feel your pain. And your feelings are real. I hope your new court date is successful!

Missy said...

Fran, you have every right to feel anyway you want about this!! It is crazy to me that paperwork is not ready or signed or whatever!!! I'm sure it will all go wonderfully well on the 26th! ((HUGS!!))

Erin Sager said...

Sorry time is slowing down. but it will all work out, I just hope very soon for you....Sending hugs your way

Alida and Geno said...

Hang in there Fran. It's not much longer for you guys and hopefully this time around it'll be successful. Hang in there. Alida